Happy Birthday, Boo Bear!

We named her Jessica Danielle, after Craig's Aunt Joann and Grandpa Dominic, but we just call her Boo Bear. She has my hair color, eye color, and stubborn determination. She has her father's body type, smile and fun-loving personality. She has her sister's love of tea parties and all things Disney. She has her own sense of adventure, twinkling eyes and aren't-I-cute-as-I-wreak-lots-of-havoc personality. She's our little baby girl, and today she turns two.

She was born on her own terms, her own timing, almost 3 full weeks early. She weighed in at 6 pounds, 6 ounces and was 19 1/4 inches long.

Her 6th and 7th week on this earth were the longest two weeks of my life. Her acid reflux left her in so much pain that she'd scream the moment you laid her down. I held her for two weeks straight, no exaggeration. We slept sitting up in the recliner, she showered with me, she never, ever left my arms. At 8 weeks I took her to the pediatrician (for the ump-teenth time), I was in tears. "Watch what happens when I lay her down," I told him. I put her on the exam table, expecting her to scream. She smiled at us both. From that day on, she was fine. Life is on Jessica's terms... always has been, probably always will be.

Beginning around her 15 month checkup, the pediatrician noticed that she was not gaining weight on average with other kids her age. We went through a long period of close monitoring, some tests, and fed her everything in sight. She remained happy, active and ate like a horse, she just didn't gain weight. Until she was ready. Once again, life on Jessica's terms... always has been, probably always will be.

Those excruciatingly long 2 weeks, and now I look back and can't believe it's been 2 years since the day she was born. Where does the time go? I'm afraid to blink, we'll be watching her graduate from college before I know it.

Life would certainly not be complete without our little ray of sunshine, who keeps us on our toes, exhausts us to no end, but fills our home with laughter, love and non-stop action. She and her sister are the loves our our lives, the meaning for our existence, and our constant reminder that you never need to look farther than the walls of your own home to see all that is good and right in this world. Perspective, love, adorableness and fun... those are just some of the gifts that she gives to us daily.

To my little Bessie Boo Boo Bear, may may your life be blessed with the same wonderful joys you give to us each and every day. Happy, Happy 2nd Birthday!

All my love,
Mommy

Good thing, small package

She looks so deep in thought, doesn't she? Actually, she's glaring at her sister, who has run off with her ball....

This is Jessica, my baby. She's 19 months old and she's "too little." I realize I'm biased, but I think she's perfect. Unfortunately, her pediatrician does not agree.

Born almost 3 full weeks early, she weighed in at a healthy 6 pounds, 6 ounces. This put her in the 35th percentile for newborns, which was great given that she was early. This means that 35% of newborns are smaller than she was, 65% are bigger. She gained weighed between each of her checkups, but not as fast as other kids. She slipped from 35th% to 15th% to 5th%, where she remained for about 9 months. Then things changed.

From 12-15 months, Jessie-Boo gained only 2.5 ounces. This put her below 0% on "the curve." Great that she had gained, but she gained much less than her "normal" rate. The pediatrician said we needed to start checking her weight every 6 weeks instead of 12. If she continued to gain, even slowly, that was fine.

In the first 6 weeks after her 15 month checkup, she gained 3.5 ounces. Still below 0%, but a gain is a gain. In the next 6 weeks, though, she lost 9.5 ounces. That put her down 6 ounces in the 3 months from 15-18 months. Not a good thing.

The pediatrician checked (for the ump-teenth time) for a heart murmur, no sign of that. Blood tests were next. What a horrible experience, to have 4 people holding down a screaming, frightened little girl to get 6 vials of blood. I'll never forget her scream, or the looks on the faces of the people in the waiting room as we were leaving -- they were full of contempt and accusation that we'd do such a thing to such a tiny little girl.

Results came back: Nothing stands out. She was in the low end of the normal range on 2 things, but nothing worrisome to the pede.

Next, a urine sample. Yeah, right! You try to get a urine sample in a plastic sticky bag from a kid who wears diapers. We have tried multiple times, no luck. The next step is a catheter and I refuse to do that unless there are simply no options left.

Here's another picture of Jessie, taken last night. She weighs 18 pounds, 9 ounces, which is about average for a 9-12 month girl. She's 19 months. I use this picture because these are 12 month pajamas on her... you can see how big they are!





Am I worried about her? Actually, I'm not. Not about her health, anyway. We're not a big family. I'm just under 5'6" tall and on a fat day, I weigh in at 115 pounds fully dressed and soaking wet. My sister (who is 25) still buys most of her clothes in the children's department. My husband is the same height as me, and none of the women in his family are taller than 5 feet. I think that Jessie-Boo just happened to get the small genes, a super-high metabolism, and is just meant to be little. There are a lot worse things in life!

She has more energy than I've ever seen, she's a happy-go-lucky kid. She's cute and smart and funny and mine. In my eyes, she's perfect.

I'll continue to keep her on a high-calorie diet. I'll continue to check her weight and monitor her growth. But I'll also continue to know in my heart that she's just fine, she's just little. She's my good thing in a small package.