My 5-year-old, Rachel, has recently starting making her bed every morning as soon as she wakes up. She does a pretty good job of straightening the sheets and the comforter and arranging her princess pillows. A few nights ago as I was tucking her into bed, I told her how proud I was of her doing this and how it gave Mommy more time to play and have fun with her and her sister when she helped out with the chores around the house.
"So you have too many chores to do, Mommy?" she asked.
"Well, there's a lot we have to do to keep our house running smoothly, so every time you and Sissy help me out, it saves me some time and I've got more time to have fun with you."
She thought for a moment. "So too many chores is the reason you never play with us and you're grumpy all the time?"
Ouch.
Ouch.
And did I mention, "Ouch?"
I didn't know what to say. I wanted to hug her, kiss her, cry. I know I play with them. And I know I'm not grumpy all the time. My husband is definitely the "playful, happy" one on a more regular basis, but that I never play with them and I'm grumpy all the time? Yeesh!
I've thought about it a lot. Lost sleep over it, actually. And what it comes down to is that it doesn't matter if I think I play with them and if I think I'm not grumpy too much. It matters what they think. Their perception, not mine, is the reality, at least in this case.
Don't get me wrong, I've heard more than my share of "you never give me treats" or "you always make me go to bed before I'm ready." And I can live with those. What I can't live with is that my kid believes I never play with her and I'm grumpy all the time.
So the problem, of course, is what to do about it. 'Cause she's right. I focus on the chores, my husband focuses on the fun. I get grumpy when things go wrong or the to-do list is too long, my husband makes it a game or says, "oh well, the world won't end." Certainly no way I can go from my Type A personality to his Type B (trust me, I've spent a long time trying... ain't gonna happen!) but I know I can make changes to play more and grump less. Much as it hurt, I think it just took the smack in the face from my daughter to make me realize I needed to do these things.
I have some ideas... more to come on this blog (and yes, in less time than it's been since my last post here!). I'm planning a "Kat Mini Makeover" (for this and some other things, too) and would love you to join me on perhaps, a mini makeover of your own. If you don't need a makeover (and hooray!! for you if you don't!), I'd love you to follow behind me and kick me when I need it. Stay tuned....
Showing posts with label fun. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fun. Show all posts
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Girlfriends Get It
There are some things in life that just cannot be explained to a man. They will just never make sense, no matter how obvious they appear to you, the woman. And it's not because there's a "right" or a "wrong," but because -- when it comes to certain things -- they just can't think like we do.
Several months ago, my friends Heather and Joe were visiting from out of town. After dinner, Heather helped to clear the table, neatly stacking dishes in the sink as I put away leftovers. She said to me, "I'll wash them all by hand, but I will not load another woman's dishwasher." This made absolute, perfect sense to me, and I thanked her for her consideration. My husband, on the other hand, got a puzzled look and asked what any man would ask. "Why not?"
"Because," Heather said, "she'll just rearrange them all after I'm gone." You know what? She was right, and I love her for saving me the trouble!
Last month, my best friend from home came to visit for a few days, along with her husband and son. It's the first time she's been to my home in the 4 years we've lived in it. Of course, I made sure there were clean sheets on the guest bed and the bathroom was in order. I even bought some wine. But when she arrived, I told her "I did not clean my house for you." She told me she appreciated the compliment, and that was exactly why we'd been such good friends for so many years. Now tell me, how many men could really get that??
Last week, Luanne blogged about her Ratatouille party. She said in her post: I don't know why we are holding stuffed animals - except they were in the kitchen at the time of the picture. Luanne? Holding stuffed animals in pictures for no apparent reason will never require an explanation when it comes to girlfriends (or sisters or daughters, or pretty much any other women on the planet). Also, I'll have to find/post some of my own "matching PJs" pics 'cause you're right, everything's more fun with your matching PJs on!
Several months ago, my friends Heather and Joe were visiting from out of town. After dinner, Heather helped to clear the table, neatly stacking dishes in the sink as I put away leftovers. She said to me, "I'll wash them all by hand, but I will not load another woman's dishwasher." This made absolute, perfect sense to me, and I thanked her for her consideration. My husband, on the other hand, got a puzzled look and asked what any man would ask. "Why not?"
"Because," Heather said, "she'll just rearrange them all after I'm gone." You know what? She was right, and I love her for saving me the trouble!
Last month, my best friend from home came to visit for a few days, along with her husband and son. It's the first time she's been to my home in the 4 years we've lived in it. Of course, I made sure there were clean sheets on the guest bed and the bathroom was in order. I even bought some wine. But when she arrived, I told her "I did not clean my house for you." She told me she appreciated the compliment, and that was exactly why we'd been such good friends for so many years. Now tell me, how many men could really get that??
Last week, Luanne blogged about her Ratatouille party. She said in her post: I don't know why we are holding stuffed animals - except they were in the kitchen at the time of the picture. Luanne? Holding stuffed animals in pictures for no apparent reason will never require an explanation when it comes to girlfriends (or sisters or daughters, or pretty much any other women on the planet). Also, I'll have to find/post some of my own "matching PJs" pics 'cause you're right, everything's more fun with your matching PJs on!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Happiness....
.... is when the only thing bigger than the smile is the glasses.
.... is "going shopping" with your sis.
.... is knowing someone will always keep your spot warm for you.
.... is playing so hard that you can't even keep your eyes open until the end of the show.
.... is two happy little chickens in a basket.
Wednesday, June 27, 2007
Insanity
Several people have asked me when my next blog is coming. Well, here it is! Yes, it's been a while since I posted, but I like to take my time mulling over my thoughts before I write them. Several weeks ago, I had an idea for a blog about the emotional baggage so many of us seem to carry around with us all the time, and why it's not as easy to lose our "baggage" as it is for an airline to lose our luggage. A week into mulling this over, I came down with a cold, which turned into strep throat, fever, dehydration, the whole "knock me on my butt" thing. I was down for the count for almost 2 weeks and I sort of put the blog out of my mind. Now that I'm feeling better, though, I'm just not "feeling" that particular blog post anymore. Back to the drawing board for me!
As I was thinking about what to blog next, I came to the conclusion that I had nothing to blog about. It's not that I don't have a million thoughts going on in my head, it's that I don't have anything deep or troubling or insightful to say right now. And then it occurs to me, why do I have to have issues before I can blog something? Why not blog on the "everyday" stuff, too?
So here it is, a blog about my insanity.
When I say insanity, I'm not talking about the clinical definition. I'm talking about all the "stuff" of life that, if you let it, will make you feel like you're losing your mind. I'm talking about those times that, if you don't decide to just laugh, you might instead end up having a nervous breakdown. My husband and I had one of those moments last Friday night.
Fridays I work from home. It's a beautiful thing, since my commute to the office is 60 miles each way. After getting hubby and the kids out the door, I have about an hour of "free" time before my work day begins. Most days, I actually work during this time, but once in a while I use the time to do laundry, clean, etc. Last Friday, I used that hour to vacuum all my floors downstairs (all tile) and pick up the kids' playroom.
Friday night is pizza night at our house, and we'd settled in for dinner around 7pm, since that's when hubby and the kids get back home. As we were trying to corral the kids over to the table before dinner got cold, hubby and I both looked at each other and said, "I'm not even hungry." Apparently, neither were the kids. The little one (1 year old) was busy pulling everything she could find out of drawers and cabinets all over the house, the dog was scratching and getting black hair all over the newly-cleaned floors, and the big one (almost 4) was dumping out bins of blocks, dolls and crayons all over the playroom. So much for our relaxing evening and my nice clean house!
It was definitely one of those moments where, had I let it, I could have crumbled to the floor in defeat at my day (week?) not going how I'd planned... my clean house now in shambles again, dinner getting cold on the table, and an impending weekend of family events and other commitments. But, at the very same moment, hubby and I just looked at each other and laughed. "This place is insane!" I said to him. "Yes," he replied, "but it's our insanity and I love it!"
You know what, he was right. We laughed and hugged and smiled at our insane kids, our insane dog, our insane house and our cold pizza. Sometimes, you just need to take a step back and realize that even when it's insane, it's yours. The fact that we have 2 beautiful kids (crazy as they are), a beautiful home, a really cool dog and dinner on the table... can anyone really ask for more? Insane or not, it's our life, and it's a beautiful one. It's a blessed one. It's one not to be taken for granted.
So next time life gets crazy, when you feel like rolling your eyes or beating your fists or crumbling to the floor, stop and look at it from a different perspective. It might be crazy, but certainly it's never boring, hopefully it's even a little bit fun. Live it to the fullest, laugh about it when you can, and love it no matter what. You only get one go-round in this world, so try your best enjoy every insane moment of it. Sometimes, it's the insane ones that matter the most.
As I was thinking about what to blog next, I came to the conclusion that I had nothing to blog about. It's not that I don't have a million thoughts going on in my head, it's that I don't have anything deep or troubling or insightful to say right now. And then it occurs to me, why do I have to have issues before I can blog something? Why not blog on the "everyday" stuff, too?
So here it is, a blog about my insanity.
When I say insanity, I'm not talking about the clinical definition. I'm talking about all the "stuff" of life that, if you let it, will make you feel like you're losing your mind. I'm talking about those times that, if you don't decide to just laugh, you might instead end up having a nervous breakdown. My husband and I had one of those moments last Friday night.
Fridays I work from home. It's a beautiful thing, since my commute to the office is 60 miles each way. After getting hubby and the kids out the door, I have about an hour of "free" time before my work day begins. Most days, I actually work during this time, but once in a while I use the time to do laundry, clean, etc. Last Friday, I used that hour to vacuum all my floors downstairs (all tile) and pick up the kids' playroom.
Friday night is pizza night at our house, and we'd settled in for dinner around 7pm, since that's when hubby and the kids get back home. As we were trying to corral the kids over to the table before dinner got cold, hubby and I both looked at each other and said, "I'm not even hungry." Apparently, neither were the kids. The little one (1 year old) was busy pulling everything she could find out of drawers and cabinets all over the house, the dog was scratching and getting black hair all over the newly-cleaned floors, and the big one (almost 4) was dumping out bins of blocks, dolls and crayons all over the playroom. So much for our relaxing evening and my nice clean house!
It was definitely one of those moments where, had I let it, I could have crumbled to the floor in defeat at my day (week?) not going how I'd planned... my clean house now in shambles again, dinner getting cold on the table, and an impending weekend of family events and other commitments. But, at the very same moment, hubby and I just looked at each other and laughed. "This place is insane!" I said to him. "Yes," he replied, "but it's our insanity and I love it!"
You know what, he was right. We laughed and hugged and smiled at our insane kids, our insane dog, our insane house and our cold pizza. Sometimes, you just need to take a step back and realize that even when it's insane, it's yours. The fact that we have 2 beautiful kids (crazy as they are), a beautiful home, a really cool dog and dinner on the table... can anyone really ask for more? Insane or not, it's our life, and it's a beautiful one. It's a blessed one. It's one not to be taken for granted.
So next time life gets crazy, when you feel like rolling your eyes or beating your fists or crumbling to the floor, stop and look at it from a different perspective. It might be crazy, but certainly it's never boring, hopefully it's even a little bit fun. Live it to the fullest, laugh about it when you can, and love it no matter what. You only get one go-round in this world, so try your best enjoy every insane moment of it. Sometimes, it's the insane ones that matter the most.
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